Are you ready for a tale of challenges, triumphs, and growth? Let me share with you my experience handling Corporate Induction Training for a batch of 120 engineers newly recruited as Data Scientists in 2022.

The brief from the reputed company was straightforward: they knew their newly recruited engineering minds had ideas, but they were not expressing them. In the few cases where they would talk, they needed training on corporate decorum.

I put my heart and soul into every single communication training I conduct, but this one was particularly special.

You see, as an engineer, I know all too well the struggle of giving an opinion until I am fully convinced of the logic. That meant I often stayed silent, even in meetings where I had some pretty good ideas. Getting these people to appreciate the inescapable need to put their opinions out in the open was a challenge that I fully cherished.

But once we got past that hurdle, it was all about strategy and practice – and these engineers excelled at it. The training was completed with a lot of goodwill on both sides. Fast forward to 2023, and the company came back with another request: some of these engineers were now interacting with clients. They needed a Structured Consultant Communication Training.

I was thrilled to take on this challenge. I knew where my struggle would lie: convincing them of the need for this change. You see, a person who works with a lot of Data, when asked to sell the story to a client, needs an entirely different set of skills. But once I sold them on the concept, this batch took over the trainings with their inputs and questions, making sure they gleaned every bit of knowledge available with the trainer.

And let me tell you, it was an impressive batch. I spent the first two hours getting them to think like the client. Then I got them back into their own shoes (yes, empathy) and they were ready for the race. Yes, there was a time constraint. But these people come from some of the best colleges across India. They are not afraid of the work required when they see the necessity.

All in all, it was another interesting and exhaustive series of training, done and delivered. The growth and progress I saw in these engineers fills me with pride, and I’m thrilled to have been a part of their journey.

has started, but my days still belong to the slow and lazy winters.

The calendar has turned, but not the weather. And so I say….

Wait.

The Calendar says
The year is hatching

But my days
Are of depth and slowness
Thoughts rooted
in marshy slumber.
Bitter, biting winds
And abstract sunrises.

How then, am I to wish you
A Happy New Year?

Wait… till my winds change
Wait… till my sun rays crinkle
Wait… for the new sap to run
The gait of blood – deep in my veins – will pick up

And together, we will celebrate.

When WEN asks me to Compere

their Calicut Diwali Night, I say a Yes.

First off, I love the WEN community and I love the energy of Diwali.

Second, compering is all about communication – and I am a communications trainer.

(Though, come to think of it, all things are about communications.)

Third, these days its all about expanding my comfort zones !

Community-Communication-Comfort – my 3 reasons – is there a hidden root word ?

The evening started out at the carnival, where Salmat, my co-host, and I wandered the stalls and made new friends – with our mikes on. We asked questions, we complimented the beautiful people, we raised the crowd’s energy. We also gave away gifts galore! We coaxed the ladies to sing and dance – we brought them to the games stall, the tattoo stall and we gave genuine shout-outs (shriek-outs ?) to the Malabar Palace chaat counter !

Then the crowd moved on to the more formal venue – where we had a presidential address, a ramp walk, a flash mob. Add to it some amazing crowd work. We asked questions on gemstones, on baking, on trends in all the verticals – having all these entrepreneurs from diverse backgrounds under one roof sure helped! It was a like a treasure trove of information.

WEN Cochin ladies came up to address the crowd and distribute some more prizes – and then the floor was thrown open to dance and dinner.

Once we switched off the mikes, we lit into the dance floor. So much energy to ground!

Kudos, Women Entrepreneurs Network, Calicut Chapter, for yet another amazing evening!

Two life changing conversations, with Sayali Kelkar and Josianne Robb!

Life Coaches, researching their business hypotheses.

On both occasions, all they asked for was my time and my stories. Time, I own enough to explore and stories, I own enough to exploit. They would collect some unbiased data for their research, and I would gather some clarity out of my life events – that was the understanding, and that is how it went.

Their questions stopped me in my tracks. I am guessing a coach is as good as the questions they ask. With the caveat “What one sees depends on how one sees”…let me share with you the crux of the two conversations.

Questions

One asked me which situations in my life gave me a sense of control. The other asked me which situations gave me a sense of change and re-invention.

Answers

Surprisingly, both questions had the same answer – all the situations where I stood up for myself. All the scenarios where I made a hard decision in favor of my own self swam up in front of my eyes. Contrary to the general thought process, putting me first did not make me feel selfish or less worthy.

Other than some immediate positive results, over a long term these life-points shaped me into an individual that I like, love and respect.

• Scenario 1 – Level Drama – Bollywood

An hour after I had delivered my baby, I knew something was wrong. From where I lay helpless, I sent my husband running to the nurse-station. The nurse came and examined, and she decided everything was normal. I knew she was wrong, but I was drifting in and out of a dream-like stance. When I next thought straight, I sent G again. With the same urgency, with the same results.

As the nurse was re-assuring me with practiced empathy, I broke through my sense of complacency. I broke the alarm box next to my hospital bed. Rather, I started breaking it, and when my husband realized what I was up to, he took over and completed the task. The hospital was now forced to follow protocol.

They did find that I was very near to bleeding out…that decision to sound the alarm saved my life by minutes.

• Scenario 2 – Business As Usual – Mothers wanting More

When I decided to pursue my life long dream of higher studies. I had found the perfect course, the perfect pedagogy and the perfect institute. And it could all be knit into my life, without over-extending any resource other than my endurance. After some initial hesitation, I went after it, “ruthlessly” (my Dad’s words).

In the city of Mumbai, for two years, I traveled most evenings from Ghatkopar to Ville Parle. For those 6 hours, I left my two little ones under the care of a helper lady. I left my life behind – and entered an arena of learning. A small, modern classroom – some great professors and industry experts – information plus wisdom.

My spouse was shuttling between Mumbai and Shanghai most of these 2 years – on a very challenging project. Mumbai being a stop-over for many of our friends and relatives, there was not a single week when we did not have someone or the other staying over with us. There were two major health crises in the family – one hit my mother and the other, me.

Some minor incidents, like my son gone missing for a few hours and me coordinating the search on Watsapp groups. Because that would be faster and more efficient than me rushing back. I remember the air leaving my lungs like a deflated balloon when he was finally found. Another night when the calling bell of our flat short circuited – firefighters saved my kids and my helper.

It would have been very easy to give up on any of those days – but I completed my masters with a 3.26 CGPA – and learnt so much that I was happy with my growth as an individual after a long time.

Outcomes

As a note to my future self, here are some outcomes from these two monumental conversations.

• Realizations

I realize I gave myself full marks for standing up and showing up for myself. These were the life-points which forged me in a way I appreciated. Pushed me to make more intentional decisions and not drift. My procedures and perceptions changed.

• Concrete Changes

The first one – on control – made me open up to take up challenging training assignments, some out of my city. I was declining all those offers believing my kids needed me more. But Sayali pointed out I was not doing justice to anyone. Their little universe had everything in hand – I was no longer the be-all in their lives. It was me too scared to let go – once I did that, we were all happier.

• Work-in-Progress

The second one – on changes and re-inventions – happened last week. Somewhere, Josianne’s questions made me stop and analyze my direction. To be precise, am I aligning towards entrepreneur-ship or self-employment ? How much of a risk am I willing to take with my training career ? What are the ways I am willing to invest beyond giving my best in each session ? When and how will I stop being the product and become, truly, the entrepreneur ?

Cycling Back to the Coaches

These two extra ordinary Life Coaches made me examine my life and learn from it.

An experience I recommend to all, as

• We are not all trained to dissect clean and learn neat these kind of incidents in our lives

• We rarely hold ourselves accountable to our own (add adjective/invective) selves
• We do not even think of ourselves as our own friend

So, once again, Thank You for raising the right questions and making me work on the answers!

The right Life Coaches are Torch-bearers – Here’s to Sayali Kelkar and Josianne Robb!

May your tribe grow.

Trained around 300 final year students from 6 graduation streams. We were a team of 3, preparing these job aspirants for employ-ability in a 10 day training program with assessments throughout.

It was the IHRD College of Applied Sciences in my city, so I was all the more curious to know the local student body. And the youth never cease to amaze.

The first day of the switch from polished corporate ways to raw campus learning was challenging. I quickly realized the energy level required is way higher. The placement officer was very dedicated, always ensuring the best interests of her students. On my side, I made sure all my sessions were peppered with practical examples and MTI nuggets.

We trained them on critical thinking, creativity, language and grooming. They were the batch that had received no real college experience due to COVID. We went about it in different ways, but made sure every person who attended had 2-3 rounds of speak-up experience in addition to everything else.

They smash all our assumptions. I had to constantly prepare and revamp my sessions, as they quickly ate up the material I had prepared and asked for more. They surprised me with their knowledge on current affairs and their willingness to speak up. Their hunger to achieve made for a refreshing change from the sophisticated corporate ways.

In corporate trainings, I believe in up-skill and not motivation. I rarely cross that line. Here that line cannot be drawn. Many of the feedback forms for me had words like “kind” “helpful” “Ma’am kept giving me chances till I gave up on withdrawing and got it right”. I was so invested I lost my voice every evening but made sure to get it back every next day morning.

On the final day, we changed avatars from trainers to HR. We grilled them. We were relentless about bringing the realities out there in today’s world to their table.

Added to my days of hectic preparation, delivery and assessments, my nights were filled with dancing. The Navratri in Calicut Gujarati Samaj is huge. Aarti at 8 pm, garba at 8.30 pm, dandiya at 11:15 pm. Amidst the huge bollywood styling of this festival elsewhere, we at Calicut still have the innocence and beauty of our elders standing right in the center of our hall, singing for us the ancient folk songs. We dance around them and around the garba sthapana right in the center. My husband being a Gujarati, and me being a happy soul when I dance, every night so far we were there from 8 pm-12 am. Three more days to go. We dance in the auditorium upstairs, we eat at the food stalls below and we socialize. We dress up to the skies.

Some days, when I was the only invigilator in a room full of 60 students cracking the aptitude assessments, my legs refused to go in straight lines. They were going criss-cross in the garba way. I would consciously look around and then stand still till my legs re-oriented.

To end this precious week, let me conclude with lessons I learn from Garba :

It is all about finding your place in the circle. Times when you lose it, keep planning, keep striving to be back.

The center circle is the fastest. To be there confidence matters more than dancing skills.

Pace yourself. Reserve energy for the songs that talk to your heart.

Its about taking up your space fully, without conceit, while not invading others space.

Sometimes, you step out into the unknown just because your friend needs a partner. Personal liberty matters, but not at the cost of your partner’s liberties.

Let your changing priorities, your changing energy and your changing surroundings guide you.

While it is all about enjoying yourselves, there is addendum to everything we do : preparing the next generation. Even when they annoy you by smashing into your neat circles with their clumsy moves.

This May, I was honored with two prestigious assignments. One, as a jury at the HR Festival of the reputed CUSAT, the Cochin University. The other one, as a guest faculty at NACIN, National Academy of Customs, Indirect Taxes & Narcotics. Both institutes need no further introduction. So I will contain my excitement and refrain from using any more superlatives.

Let me dive straight into what I was called in for.

The 37th year of the prestigious South Indian Management Festival, Talentime, organized by the School of Management Studies in CUSAT, had a case study based competition. They called it the Hegde Rush.

I was privileged to be asked to set the case study, be a part of the jury to evaluate the teams that made it into the finals and at the end of that journey, to present to them a power talk on EI and Leadership. All of which proved to be very rewarding tasks, given the competence and assiduity the student teams displayed. The teams which presented had a good grip on their subject. So the other member of the Jury, Ms. Reshma Swaminathan, and I had a good time digging to see how deep their know-how and know-why went. The talk went off on a happy tangent, with the students trying and relating everything I said to their own lives and questions. The organizing team were in another league altogether. To name one in particular, Malini M, has exceptional talents in leadership and organization.

The NACIN assignment was one of training. Communications as well as Personality development. I can say that in the course of that one day, I myself evolved as a trainer. These were people who had joined as uniformed officers in our nation’s service, so they had already undergone a stringent selection process. Only the best had emerged. Now to train with them, I had to assert my authority, as well as get them on my side. Build trust as well as showcase leadership.

Things I train people on, but to establish that for myself in a room with 30+ trainees who were with me for the one day; to make sure they learned, they were not lost in a constant barrage of information, they could practice what they learnt, and ensuring that dignity and respect remained on both sides of the table at the end of a long, hard day…

I started with a story that caught hold of their imagination. I could use it as a metaphor for the rest of the day when I wished to commend or redirect someone. I went on to the theory behind confidence. Then I delved into strategies and tactics. Then I delved into communication a bit. Finally got them all to walk to the dais and present on their own topics. Ended with a session on personality development and finally, yet another story on acknowledgement, apologies and appreciation : the 3 things leaders do, day in, day out.

The glowing feedback I received at the end of both the assignments had me floating around for a couple of days. Which is what kept me from writing this down so far; I believe my two feet have been properly restored to the ground now. Some successes are worth all the silent sacrifices in the background.